Free the Dragons / A Step Back

Sometimes we have to step back to step forward.

A Step Back

Hi, my name is Max Tell. This is part two of my series of personal stories,
"Free the Dragons". Have you faced your dragons today? 

Part Two: A Step Back Is One Step from Stepping Forward

Last week, I failed to create a podcast. 

At first, I blamed it on being too busy preparing for a performance with
my new accompanist, Anna Boots.

Then I blamed it on my struggle to create a great title for this series of
podcasts. My first choice was "Kill the Dragons", then "Save the Dragons",
and finally "Free the Dragons". With these three titles struggling for first
place, I became confused as to which was best. I wanted my title to be
perfect. That in itself was a barrier. Perfection is too nebulous a goal.

Later in the week, I blamed my struggle on David Risley. 

Risley's fascinating series of video blogs outlines how to plan and organize
a blog series in thirty days. On Day Three, Risley talks about using a
calendar to be proactive and to preplan one's blog in advance. The purpose
of preplanning is to coordinate one's posts with one's promotional and
selling strategy. 

Once again, I felt stuck. On the one hand, Risley's approach sounded
logical, on track, the right path to take. On the other, I felt there was
something wrong with his approach, in terms of what I was doing. My
current posts are not about selling, but healing, though somehow selling
has to come into the picture or how am I to survive as an artist.

Still, I felt stuck, dead in my tracks, blaming other forces for standing in
my way. (I'll talk more about blame and the three problems listed above
in later posts.)

Now back to my current issue: how to get back to creating my podcasts
with three obstacles standing in my way? 

Last night, it came to me. As important as these three obstacles are, and
as important as it is for me to face and deal with them, in varying degrees,
not one of them is the key to my current struggle.  

I'm afraid. That's right, afraid. 

I'm afraid of truly facing my dragons. That fear and nothing else forced me
to step back. With that realization, I suddenly felt as I did many years ago
when I was in grade one, when the first great dragon of my life raised her
head high above me. By recognizing and accepting my fear, I now feel ready
to take my next step forward. 

I'll tell you more about this in Part 3 of this series, "Free the Dragons".
I call it The Ping Pong Paddle.

You may have already realized by now that I have solved one of my first
three problems simply by talking though it, while preparing this podcast.
I have finally decided on a good title. 

This is Max Tell. Please join me next week as I not only face one of my
dragons but also set it free.

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